This month is really hard.
4:30am alarm, barista got called into jury duty last night, working solo this morning / nobody could cover, cup broke, stupid cough, meetings and bills and emails and phone calls, fatigue, stress.
I prayed for a slow morning. And He so graciously provided…
Perspective, right? First world problems.
Please pray for Nepal.
Even though I am emotionally spent, I discussed with a few brothers who came to visit the shop today what it means to be grateful. That wallowing is dangerous but feeling your emotions is valid. That God is bigger than your emotions and that I have to actively not let my emotions consume me. That God holds your hand and sustains you during your lows, your stresses…Jesus grieves alongside you.
Even though my car repairs plus rental car totaled more than $9300, His faithfulness shows through community, support, financial providence. Blown away at the extreme kindness of others. Undeserving.
Even though I am feeling tension in relationships, I have a rescue dog who loves me with puppy eyes and cuddles. Comforted.
Even though I see more that 2000+ people a week, a lot of them are regulars and locals whom I want to invest in and truly love getting to know. Uplifted.
Even though I have to make tough business decisions, He knows my heart and He knows that I want to extend grace to others. And He is an amazing God who knows. He knows and lavishes grace on tough situations.
Even though I am in a season of painful patience and waiting, I know that I am fully known and loved. To let others lead. That me taking the initiative all the time…I’ve done enough. Encouraged.
This post is grammatically all over the place, but it is a true representation of all the thoughts, burdens, stresses, joys, feelings I’ve been holding and carrying. My life is so full and I cannot help but be grateful.
“I write about the power of trying, because I want to be okay with failing. I write about generosity because I battle selfishness. I write about joy because I know sorrow. I write about faith because I almost lost mine, and I know what it is to be broken and in need of redemption. I write about gratitude because I am thankful – for all of it.” – Kristin Armstrong
Saturdays are the hardest. I was so drained today that I took a two hour nap. It’s a wonder that I used to have Saturdays free/available all the time just three years ago…
You are deeply known.
You are deeply loved.
If you only knew. Let’s walk with Jesus togethers.